Day 2

Today it was a bit harder to figure out what I was going to do for my experiment. I got a lot of stuff done at work today but I couldn't think of what I could do with excellence. The work I did was good, and it met the necessary deliverables, but it didn't feel like excellence. I was tired and feeling like I had more to do than I could manage. One thing really rung with me today though. I attended a virtual seminar about career building. One of the speakers was our CMO, Sue Bostrom. Great speaker. One thing that she said that really stuck with me though was that for every deliverable you have, hit it out of the park. Even if you don't like what you're doing, be known for your performance and what you deliver. So as I was making my way through all my stuff today, I kept thinking "just hit it out of the park", don't shoot for anything less. It may not have been excellence, but I feel like I got some good work done.
Tonight when I came home I wasn't sure what to do that would be something I loved to do either. It seems that the things I was thinking of were just routine. I like watching Criminal Minds, I like to read, I didn't feel like playing the guitar or singing or cooking. But then it occurred to me - reading is something I love to do, especially if it's a really good book. My wife bought me the latest book in the "Eye of the World" series. Brandon Sanderson is finishing Robert Jordan's series based on the notes and outline Jordan dictated before he died. This was the first fantasy fiction series I've read and it got me hooked on the genre. So I gave myself permission to sit down, read and enjoy. Then tonight I started a new puzzle. I got the entire border together. I love putting together puzzles but they've always seemed like indulging in free time that I should spend doing something else. I let it go and started a new puzzle tonight! and I didn't even feel consumed by it like I usually do. I don't know if this is a temporary side effect of the experiment or not, but right now, doing things I love intentionally seems to free from the compulsion to dive in deep to a pastime that takes me away from the drudgery of work and everyday life. I feel more in control. We'll see if it lasts... ;-)